
Find friends in a strange city
Table of contents
Table of contents
Are you a stranger in the city, don’t know anyone and feel alone? We can help you make new contacts quickly.
#1 Rekindle old friendships
The easiest way to make friends in a new city is, of course, to already have or have had friends there. Perhaps you already know someone in the city or an old classmate has moved to the city you are now moving to?
Don’t be afraid to get in touch and suggest a meeting. If the friendship is rekindled, it won’t be long before the new old friend takes you along to their friends’ parties. Which brings us to the next tip.
#2 Get to know friends of friends
Your friends also have friends that you don’t (yet) know. Join them, perhaps at the next party of one of your friends’ friends? There’s a good chance that you’ll get on with these people too – after all, your friends have good taste when it comes to choosing the people they like to spend time with 😉
Our tip: We have collected routes near the Staytoo houses.
#3 Take a trip
Make yourself a few sandwiches, fill your water bottle with water or tea, pack both in a small rucksack and off you go – that’s all you need for a short trip.
Whether you’re walking through the city or exploring nearby forests on an (e-)bike: Sooner or later you will meet other adventurous people, e.g. at a rest stop, and you can swap stories with them. Who knows, maybe this will lead to an adventure group in which you regularly do something together?
In cities, there are hiking and jogging groups that meet regularly. Take a look at portals such as Lauftreff or Wander Community to find suitable people.
Our tip: We have collected routes near the Staytoo houses.
#4 Visit university events
Pub crawls, introductory events, campus tours: Use university events whenever possible to make friends in a new city. Especially at the start of the semester, universities offer events such as Freshers’ Week so that fellow students and lecturers can get to know each other. You can find the events on offer on the website of your university or university of applied sciences.
#5 Get to know your Staytoo neighbors
Many exciting people like you live at Staytoo. It’s worth getting to know them. For example, how about inviting your neighbor over for a cup of tea or to cook together? Great friendships have also been formed during board game evenings or walks together.
Our tip: Did you know that Staytoo offers its own events? BBQ in summer, MovieInParty, semester kick-off party, Halloween hangover brunch: there’s always something going on here, but you also have your own space. True to the motto: Staytoo is you!
Follow us on our Instagram account, where we regularly share information about Staytoo events such as house parties. You’ll also find videos with tips from other students. Of course you can also find us on TikTok.
#6 Take part in events
Exciting events can be found in every city, for example neighborhood festivals, concerts, exhibitions or theater performances. It may feel strange to go to an event alone, but once you’re there, you’ll realize that it’s fun too. The important thing is that you get involved and remain open and relaxed. This will give you the best chance of striking up conversations with others.
#7 Organize an event yourself
If you are new to a foreign city, know that others feel the same way. Every newcomer is happy to have opportunities to get to know each other. It’s a great opportunity if you create these opportunities yourself, be it through a picnic, a movie night or a group walk to get to know each other.
For the aforementioned movie night, which you can post as an event call in an Insta story, you will need technical equipment such as a projector, laptop etc. as well as chairs. Everyone can bring something, so there is also a joint planning process that you can discuss online. As the organizer of your own events, you will also learn important soft skills such as how to set up and successfully manage a project.
#8 Join a club (music, sports, etc.)
Have you sung in a choir or enjoy playing volleyball? Time to join a club! There are usually taster sessions where you can check whether you feel comfortable with the people, the facilities, etc. A shared hobby brings people together, so you’ll quickly make friends this way.
Extra tip: Check the offers for university sports or university sports to see if there are any suitable courses for you. These courses are often cheaper than normal courses in the city and you will also get to know fellow students.
#9 Try social apps
Yes, we all know Tinder. But it doesn’t always have to be dating: there are also apps that help you find friends in a new city. The most popular are:
Each app has different special features. Meetup focuses on groups and joint activities online and offline.
We3 is based on the concept of the mini-group: It says that friendships are best formed when three people meet to get to know each other.
Spontacs, on the other hand, offers you the opportunity to meet people from your area to spontaneously experience a leisure activity with them, such as going to the movies or playing sports.
Bumble For Friends specializes in the match function, which means that when two potential friends match, they only have 24 hours to get in touch with each other. This “pressure” has the advantage that you venture out of your comfort zone and make the first move before the opportunity passes.
Extra tip: Enter your university on Bumble For Friends to find suitable contacts from your university environment.
#10 Get a part-time job
Most students do this anyway to earn some money on the side. You can combine the intention to increase your bank balance with making friends in your new city. When choosing a part-time job, make sure that you will be in contact with people. A job in the archives may be pleasantly quiet, but probably not the right way to make new friends.
Here are a few jobs where you’ll interact with people a lot:
- Language tandem (translator)
- cinema/theater box office
- Supermarket work
- Promotion jobs
- Recruiting members for associations
- Catering and event jobs (catering, service, etc.)
Of course, it’s particularly clever if you find a job that allows you to make new friends and further your career. Take a look at the online job boards or our tips for creative part-time jobs.
#11 Start with Co-Learning or Working
Why always sit alone in a small room and brood to yourself? More and more universities in Germany are offering co-learning spaces in which open learning rooms are made available. The learning spaces are often equipped with multimedia such as touch displays or laptops to borrow.
Not only do you get to know fellow students there, but you also increase your learning effectiveness at the same time.
Co-working spaces are particularly interesting for you if you want to start your own business as a student and build up a professional network while you are still a student. This is because other self-employed people, e.g. web designers, developers and graphic designers, often work in co-working spaces.
Co-working spaces are usually subject to a fee, but a small investment in a desk that you can book flexibly will definitely pay off for the expansion of your private and professional network.
#12 Use the bulletin board
Maybe a bit oldschool, but still present at many universities: The bulletin board with all kinds of notices, from book giveaways to carpooling opportunities to course offers, there are plenty of chances to make friends in your new city. Some bulletin boards even include personals, reminiscent of the classic personals in newspapers.
#13 Talk to people outside
Admittedly, this is not the right way for everyone to make friends in a new city. But it is often easier than you think to get in touch with other people out there. Most people are open to it and are happy to have such a pleasant surprise in their everyday lives.
The biggest hurdle here is starting the conversation. Questions are a great way to make it easier.
Our tip: Greet people with a friendly “hello” and a smile, this often works wonders.
You can start a conversation with a stranger with these questions:
- Do you know a good restaurant nearby?
- I’m new in town, do you know where is a good place to party/sport/go on an excursion?
Questions can also be combined with compliments:
- Nice jacket, did you buy it here in town?
- If I may say so honestly: You seem likeable and as a newcomer I am looking for some
- I’m looking for a bit of a connection in the city. Would you like to go out for ice cream with me?
These are just sample questions that you can adapt as you wish. It is important that you ask a positive, innocuous question that invites small talk. You should definitely avoid topics such as politics or religion, as these are very personal and often emotional topics.
#14 Try Language Tandem
Language tandem is a great way to make friends in a new city: You have a common interest with your tandem partner, you both want to learn a language. The language tandem is the perfect method for this, because a native speaker corrects each other. Through the regular exchange, you automatically get to know each other better and possibly become friends.
Difficulty making friends in a new city
Sometimes it can be difficult to make new friends. You are not alone in this! Get to know the typical difficulties that many students struggle with when they are new to a foreign city:
Start-up time: friendships are not formed overnight, but through regular activities together. This strengthens your bond of friendship, but also means that you have to invest time and commitment in new friendships.
Anonymity at large universities: At universities and colleges with thousands of students, the individual is hardly noticed. The support provided by lecturers is generally more impersonal, as is the interaction between students. Individual conversations fall by the wayside or are fleeting. Some students withdraw in such an anonymous atmosphere instead of trying to make new contacts.
Finding connections in existing groups: An existing group is an established social structure. There are certain dynamics (keyword insider jokes), routines and even hierarchies. It sounds stupid, but the new individual must first “prove” to a group whether you are on the same wavelength.
How to deal with the difficulties
The most important thing is that you don’t take setbacks in making new friends personally.
A contact no longer responds to your calls or messages, even though you thought a friendship was forming between you?
A group no longer informs you about its activities?
That hurts, no question. But in the vast majority of cases, it doesn’t mean that something is wrong with you. Sometimes it’s just not right, so just keep looking for people you get on really well with.
Tip: Are you unsure whether you have qualities that make you socially awkward? Ask those closest to you how they perceive you to find out how you are perceived from the outside.
Extra tip: Combine our tips
We recommend that you make friends in different ways. So don’t just rely on dating apps, but overcome your inhibitions and also approach people in real life, visit our Staytoo events, etc. It’s all in the mix and you’ll meet great people faster. 🙂
More articles in our blog
Studying is an intensive, varied and challenging time. In our article, we show you the most important steps for coping well during this time:
Making new friends can take quite a while before you are successful. Keep an open mind and over time you will have a social environment in which you feel comfortable.
We from the Staytoo team wish you lots of fun and success!
Ahoy 😉